


silver and gold i have none (but i bring you hope)

by cyaranide



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Blood and Violence, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mostly hurt, Post-Timeskip | War Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:33:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24662365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyaranide/pseuds/cyaranide
Summary: The darkness in Dimitri's mind was something he couldn't fathom, no matter how hard Claude tried. Yet, he tried all the same, even if it's the last thing he did on this goddess forsaken soil.(Because he never gave up, not on anything; not on Dimitri.)
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Claude von Riegan
Comments: 4
Kudos: 52





	silver and gold i have none (but i bring you hope)

**Author's Note:**

> title from [fake.guitars](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDO3g__ZR9M) by lost spaces
> 
> shoutout to sunny for being my beta and hear me cry over dimiclaude

Claude heard the commotion when he walked past the monastery entrance, hands full with battle plans and future strategies that he needed to review for their next battle against the Empire. It was safe to assume that it wasn’t something serious when no one directly reported to him, but it was curiosity, anticipation, and most of all the dread in the pit of his stomach that made him walk towards the gate. He noticed there were fewer troops around than the usual numbers, and if the merchants’ faces were any indication, then Claude was afraid that this feeling in his gut was right.

Upon noticing him, the gatekeeper stood up to salute him. “Good day, Lord Riegan! Nothing to report!” at that, he hesitated. “Actually… there were sights of Imperial scouts around the monastery and Prince Dimitri stormed out of the gate a few minutes ago. We sent a few troops to aid him.”

Claude hummed in confirmation at the gatekeeper’s report.  _ Of course,  _ he thought, more resignation than anything. Of course it was Dimitri, charging towards any Imperial soldiers without a care to his wounds or even anything at all. To think that he was finally getting better… it was probably the sight of Edelgard after many years that pushed him further to the edge. “Do you know which direction he is headed?” the gatekeeper nodded. “Good. I’ll track him.”

“Do I need to bring you your weapon, my lord?”

“No, but please take this and give it to Hilda,” Claude smiled, and the gatekeeper hesitated before saluting once more and opening the gate for Claude. He could guess what the troops were thinking; Claude brought no weapons with him, only a small dagger visible on his belt, yet he walked to meet the berserk boar prince running havoc somewhere in the woods. If Claude were to die in the prince’s hands due to sheer blind rage, it would break the whole army apart.

It didn’t take long for Claude to find Dimitri, really. It was easy to track the hasty footprints (biar tracks ga ngulang) on the muddy ground and disproportionate slashes on the trees and bushes, likely because Dimitri’s reckless usage of his lance. When his feet stumbled upon the fresh corpse of an Imperial soldier, he knew that Dimitri was near—if the inhumane noises he heard was enough indication. There were also some Alliance soldiers, circling the spot where Dimitri was likely located, nervous like they’re facing off a Demonic Beast. The shock on their faces was evident when they saw Claude near them, and the relief was clear as day as Claude dismissed the troops.

“They have all been taken care of,” one soldier reported just before he went to retreat. He casted a nervous glance backward, where they could hear distinct noises that can only be described as  _ animalistic _ . “But… Your Highness is still there.”

“I’ll take it from here,” Claude assured him with a smile, patting his shoulder before the soldier ran off towards the monastery, giving Claude cautionary glances which he promptly ignored. He walked further inside the woods, stumbling upon more dead bodies wearing Imperial uniforms, until he saw Dimitri’s figure, menacing even from behind, lance high in the air and surrounded by corpses. Claude did nothing but watch as Dimitri’s rage dissipated, watched it waste away and leave nothing behind but exhaustion. It hurted; to see the boy he once knew turning into a husk of empty shell, that nothing in his life mattered but the blood on his hands and Edelgard’s head on a spike. It hurted more when there’s nothing Claude can do but stand on the sideline, only able to  _ watch  _ and  _ wonder _ .

Dimitri finally stopped his rage, lance still deep inside the corpse, and the silence that followed was almost deafening. After a while, Claude made his presence known as he let out a low hum, walking slowly toward Dimitri. “It’s done, Dimitri,” he said softly, aching to reach out and pull Dimitri to his embrace—but no, not yet. Not when Dimitri was still lost, the voices in his head screaming and haunting. “Let’s go back.”

“It’s not finished,” Dimitri snarled, his grip around his lance shaking. “Edelgard is still alive. This is far from done.”

_ Edelgard.  _ Dimitri spoke her name like he spit poison, and Claude could never forget the glint in his eyes when their armies met at Gronder.  _ A beast,  _ they said, and Claude had understood then. “You will have her head,” Claude said, giving nothing away in his tone. “But you’re still recovering from Gronder and you’ll open up your wounds again. The longer it takes for you to properly heal, the longer we can march to Enbarr.”

Underneath the thin brown shirt and his fur cloak, Dimitri’s bandages were stained red, blood seeping through the fabric. Not to mention the new wounds that he received/sustained from the opposing soldiers, slashes and cuts marking his skin anew. But Dimitri wasn’t feeling the pain—and if he did, he paid them no mind.

“I don’t care,” Dimitri ducked his head to the dead bodies surrounding him, to the one beneath his feet, mangled beyond recognition. “The dead—they are growing impatient. They want Edelgard’s head now. They need their peace, they need their  _ revenge _ ,” with every word he stabbed the poor corpse again and again, splattering blood all over until there was no more. “They kept screaming, demanding, they— _ they won’t stop _ ,  _ Claude. _ ”

His last words were hoarse, whispered in the dead of the woods but Claude heard it all the same. His shoulders shook as he stepped back, away from the monstrosity he caused. He finally turned around at Claude, blue eyes dull and so,  _ so,  _ broken.

Claude almost felt like Dimitri was beyond repair.

(But he didn’t even want to think  _ that _ , to even think that he’s giving up on Dimitri,  _ of all people. _ )

Claude didn’t know how the voices haunted Dimitri or how to chase the nightmares away. All the books in his disposal gave no clues as to what he should do with the prince. He tried, all the same. Anything to keep Dimitri sane,  _ anything  _ to keep the voices out of his head. And if it means watching Dimitri as he roared and raged on a pile of dead bodies, then Claude would let him.

“They’ll stop if I—” Dimitri turned to another body, stabbing it with his weapon just like what he did to the previous body, the same grotesque, the same fervor. “Only when I kill, and  _ kill _ , and take everything… they shut up. But then they would keep screaming, they keep demanding, they—”

Dimitri choked on his words, voice turning feral as he growled and broke his weapon in half. Claude hardly blinked an eye. There were words of fear, unspoken between them, but they both knew what Dimitri would say.

_ What if  _ they  _ won’t stop, even after Edelgard was dead by Dimitri’s hands? _

The war took a toll on them, Dimitri even more so. Claude knew that wishing for the boy he knew five years ago to come back now was useless; to hope that everything would return to how it was, before the war. “We will march to Enbarr in a few weeks and you can face her,” Claude repeated. It wasn’t a false promise, or a lure to get Dimitri out of his rage. It was the plan, something that Dimitri acutely aware of, but he was far too blind to see it right now. “When we reach Enbarr, she’s all yours. You have my words.”

Dimitri snarled, but he stumbled away from the mountains of corpses, from the broken weapons and stench of blood. He closed his eyes and gritted his teeth, the pain in his head becoming unbearable. “Do you swear it?” he said, voice rough and demanding, yet Claude could sense the vulnerability in his words, a plea of help. “Do you swear that woman will be dead?”

“I swear,” Claude said, “I swear to you to bring everything that you wish for. Your Kingdom, Edelgard’s head, anything.” Carefully, he took Dimitri’s hand, drenched with blood—his or others, Claude didn’t know. He let their fingers intertwined, let the blood drip and coat his own. Because in the end, Claude was no different—none of them are clean from the countless crimes they had committed. Claude let his lips brush against Dimitri’s knuckles, let the red fluid smear on his lips as he smiled at Dimitri. “You know I would give you the world if you ever ask.”

“But for now,” Claude let his smile slip, whispered it in the silence, only for their ears to hear. “For now, come back, Dima. Come back to  _ me _ .”

The silence fell upon them like lead, and it felt like an eternity of Claude gazing at Dimitri’s blank, blue eyes until he saw a flash of life inside. Dimitri was still tense, gripping Claude’s hand like he wanted to break it  _ (and he might, Claude was sure of that, but he was a fool that trusted and hoped too much for his own good) _ , but he didn’t pull back nor growl at him. Claude took it as a good sign, and with tentative steps he walked back. Dimitri’s feet dragged on the ground, but he followed suit with no restraint, and Claude allowed himself a sigh of relief.

The end of the war, the peace of Fodlan, Claude’s dreams of the world without borders—everything seemed too far away.

But right now, with his hand intertwined with Dimitri’s, Claude thought that this would be enough.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> sunny: "i do love a feral man and his emotional support pretty boy"


End file.
